Sorry I haven’t posted in a while, the holidays get hectic. The second date with the Pianoman was overall wonderful. We had a good time eating fabulous dinner that I cooked, thank you, and good conversation over a bottle of wine. A few drawbacks though, he is a heavy smoker. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to sound like a hypocrite, because I am known to have a cigarette or two. But he could barely last an hour before he needed a puff. I just don’t know if I can handle that, I don’t want to surround myself around a bad influence.
We went to the movies and it was great! However, I’m really beginning to think that a movie date is the worse idea ever. You don’t get to really know each other and the awkward ‘should I grab his arm or not’ keeps popping in my head. I wish I would have just gone for it, stop over thinking every little thing. Anyways, when he dropped me off, there was no good night kiss. I was pretty disappointed but didn’t want to force anything either.
We’ve still been talking and might make some plans for this weekend, but not sure yet. Either way, I’m on the fence with him. I really like him, but really don’t like certain things about him; he doesn’t seem to have big goals and the smoking thing is pretty iffy (he said he’s trying to quit).
I do want to continue to see him though, because darn it… I am in NEED of a makeout. I have been so uptight and I feel the need to let lose. I’m not being myself when I’m so guarded and I hate it.
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